Worry

The tragedy in Newtown CT and its aftermath are heartbreaking.  There are difficult and complicated questions to be addressed.

Yet, for some of us left behind, one of the repercussions feels familiar.  It's the anxiety of dropping a helpless child off at school, in the care of others.  Those of us with children with diabetes (and countless other medical, emotional, or mental health needs) are particularly familiar with this feeling. 

So this morning, as I dropped my daughter off at school, unable to not think about Friday's terror, I summoned some coping skills I've used before. 

I kissed her goodbye, told her I loved her, and confirmed our plans as to how and when she will return home.

I watched her cross the street with the crossing guard and walk to the school doors. 

Then I brought to mind the adults she will spend the day with, reminding myself that I trust them and that they have her best interests at heart.

Each day, though some days more subconsciously now, I remind myself that the staff at school know how to take care of her.  They know about her medical issues and how to address them.  There is a plan in place for her care.  Beyond that, her teachers and other school staff are concerned about her as a growing and maturing individual and do their best to help her in any way they can.  This is, of course, their job.  But from what I see from the outside, she's been fortunate to have teachers and other staff members who take it an extra step.

By extension, I must then trust that in all other ways her school is as safe as possible.  There are plans in place for many types of disastrous situations.  Communications from the school district say more plans are being made.  She is in the care of good and kind people who have their students' best interests at heart.

There is no way to be sure what each new day will bring.  Potential hazards lurk around every corner.  All we can do is prepare for foreseeable eventualities as best we can. Then we take a deep breath, and send our children off into the world, trusting those in whose hands we leave them to do their best to keep them safe.